Each day we face numerous decisions. Whether or not to get up, what to eat, how to respond in conversation, and the list goes on. Scores of choices on a daily basis. Some menial, some perfunctory, and some of greater magnitude.
But it is the life changing decisions- those that cause us to pause, inhale deeply, and wonder what to do next when they arise- that require a great deal of our time and energy. One of the most uniquely distinguishing traits among humans is how we make these decisions. The reasoning (or sometimes lack thereof) behind these choices is essential to defining who we are. The process we take when exploring these crossroads is indicative of our values, beliefs, and relationships- or, from a holistic perspective, they are the architecture of the individual.
As I have further embraced the lifestyle of the “examined life”, I have identified three different forces that contribute to my decision making process: the gut, the head, and the heart (in order of typical emergence). A decision making triumvirate.
The gut. It can most accurately be defined as my impulsive and initial reaction (emanating from the gut- hence the name). It is the potent voice that screams loud when the initial decision emerges. Often times the choice that appears is the product of the gut’s criteria. It is apparent and unequivocal. It provides a clear course of action and it seems, at the time, it is the most desirable option.
The head. This factor is rooted in logic. It is the logos filter of the triumvirate. It is where all the options are micro-analyzed and weighed on the merits. Frequently the choices will be ranked by their affect on practical circumstances: how will it influence my income, free-time, relationships, etc. Each option is explored multiple times and often ad nauseum. While there is often some clarity following this factor, it usually does not singularly drive a decision.
The heart. While the heart shares some of the emotional intensity of the gut, it is the chronological significance in the decision making process that differentiates this factor. It usually comes at the end of the decision making lifecycle. It is the continuous yet subtle feeling that consumes my consciousness and often seems like it should be the final decision.
Each of these factors has value. It is only through deep, focused reflection over past decisions that I am able to understand the role that each factor has in my decision making process. While each of these factors could play a role in my choices, they will probably never wield an equal influence during the process (i.e. a decision might be made primarily with my gut reaction with only minimal consideration from my head and heart).
The challenge is to not let one factor unduly influence a choice. I find the Aristotelian theory of the Golden Mean applicable, and believe balance is critical to making the most effective decision (we will avoid the deeper philosophical question on whether there is such thing as a “good” decision).
The most tantalizing aspect is witnessing what criteria will trigger a specific factor during a decision. Given the inherent variance of every decision, it is expected and logical that one of the three factors will have more resonance with me than the others.
Ultimately, in life it is our actions that define us. They are the telling, personal indications that create our persona- our being. Behind our actions is the choices the drive us to action. The essence of living is taking on these choices and moving forward with action.
I believe a key to moving closer to enlightenment is understanding the decisions we make. They will continue to come at us but through reflection and meditation we can learn why we make the choices we do. And with this knowledge we can more effectively navigate the tough decisions that will inevitably arise.
These are great points. I have "read" (i.e. listened) to a book recently which broke it down to only two aspects, not 3. The author use a great analogy of a rider on an elephant. The rider is the intellect. The elephant is the emotion. The best decisions were made when the emotional "elephant" and the intellectual driver were in unison, harmony and agreement. This "balance" is also, by the way, a convincing methodology of persuasion to not only make personal decisions but to drive others to change.
ReplyDeleteIt may not be as important to label the constituents of a decision but to honor the balance you correctly mention. We can label the elements many things:
A) Head, heart, mind
B) Driver / Elephant
C) Ethos, Pathos, Logos
D) Gut, Intellect, Heart
E) "Right Thinking"
I've listed a 7 rules for decisions that seem to work from my perspective at least when choosing from course A or course B:
1. Which course allows most learning or growth?
2. Do you need learning or growth at this point in your life or need to cover a more basic need?
3. All things even ... are you taking the easy way to avoid pain. (Not that there is "anything wrong w/ that" ... maybe pain avoidance is needed at this point - consider the environment).
4. Have you considered who else is involved in the decision? It may not be obvious but we are social creatures. Just make sure the motives are not overly selfish because the elephant can easily spend all day at the watering hole and not move one log to help construct a better life.
5. Are you overly fearful of a loss. The losses of our lives are actually where the learning comes in. The easy way is often static and devoid of learning and growth.
6. Consider what you want written on your tombstone ... Which decision supports that vision A or B.
7. Imagine that you are explaining the decision to both your grandfather and to your young child. Which decision A or B is simpler to convey.
good ideas. do you think all decisions are an interaction of reason,emotion, and impulse ie all carry equal weight w/i the balance of the eventual action tom
ReplyDelete